I believe in sharing things, I like to share my time, my fun, and myself with others. My best friend and I share a lot more than most women would, or could. I am not an exclusive type in almost any way.
Recently my share and share alike mantra has been rattled. I am not as open, and inclusive as I once was. There are things I believe worth having, but they come at a price too high to bear if you’re so inclined to share.
I recently told a close friend I cannot share something. It felt good at the time, like I was being true to myself. I am at one with my inner and more authentic self. Then my nasty little need to please disease inside me is screaming out for reconsideration!
I will hold steadfastly to my saying “NO”. Good word. No. I like it. I like how it makes me feel free. I said NO to something I usually say yes to. And I think while my need to please disease is screaming out for some relief, and I am sure saying no to this friend may have caused a ripple, or even slight tear in the fabric that weaved us together may end up with someone else liking me less, I may end up liking myself more.
Call me Ishmael, or selfish. This is my story and I am sticking to it.